Shoot Straight

I grew up around guns...my grandfather, uncle, father, and brother hunted...my grandparents lived in the Everglades on a million acres of woods.  We had airboats, a full-track buggy, a small airplane, Ford trucks complete with gun racks and rebel flags with red bone hound dogs, blue ticks, and beagles in the beds of the trucks...my father had a hunting cabin out in the middle of the Everglades only accessible by the airboat, plane or the full track.  If you're thinking rednecks, you would be correct...that was my family with the exception of me, my sister and my mother :)

So today I did something I have never done in my life...I went to a gun range, all by myself.  

A friend gave me a nice *little* revolver about 6 years ago...if you ever read this, my friend, thank you...

I've never shot it until today...WOW what an experience...



Smith & Wesson 357 Magnum

my instructor was awesome...he was very knowledgeable, very patient, very thorough...he spent a long time explaining every little detail of the gun, the ammo, loading, unloading, how to hold it, how to stand, he fired it twice and then it was my turn...here's my first 6 rounds...not too bad...

As soon as I fired the sixth bullet, I was ready to leave...my legs were shaking and I was shocked at what I was doing...it was a strange but an exhilerating feeling...so I stayed and fired another six rounds...and look, I got a lot better...my instructor was quite impressed!

I had wanted to do some agility training this morning but we got rained out so Shoot Straight is where I ended up...it was an amazing experience.  I plan to take a class and will continue to go and practice...now to fit that in to my workouts, zumba classes, dog training and showing schedule :))))

Dedications...

Webster's defines dedication as = an act or rite of dedicating to a divine being or to a sacred use; a devoting or setting aside for a particular purpose; a name and often a message prefixed to a literary, musical, or artistic production in tribute to a person or cause


My first dedication is for my nephew, Bruce...about this time last year, he was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma...he lives in Miami with his girlfriend and young son.  He'd pretty much just gotten his life together, had a decent job at Petsmart was trying to make ends meet.  Although he had health insurance, the out of pocket expenses for his chemo treatments and such were insane...but he managed with his insurance and my sister and mom's help..and underwent many chemo treatments. 

I put on an agility fundraiser and with the help and support of a TON of folks, people I knew and some I didn't even know, none of them knowing Bruce, I managed to raise about $2,500.00...dog people are just the best...yesterday my sister emailed me to tell me that Bruce's recent pet scan came back perfect...no reoccurring cancer...awesome news!

Here's a picture of Bruce and his little boy, Joshua



My next dedication, and the reason for this blog, is to my amazing dog, Triumph...I have been forced recently to live my life without a few things I had grown to love, but I cannot imagine my life without my dogs...especially this one as he has been one of the reasons for my laughs and smiles every day...he would really like to get back to our normal routine and back to some training...here are a couple of pictures taken of him at the USDAA trial in Orlando last month...such a good dog...I am so blessed to know him...

My third dedication is to my family and all of my amazing friends, agility friends, non-dog friends, those that live far and near, my friends at work, my friend and neighbors, and the two attorneys I work for...I thank you for all your support, patience, understanding, for advice and for just listening...

And finally, Patty Smyth, remember her?  I sure do...1992...always loved her music and voice...thank you Luann for sharing this CD with me...

so my last dedication, to Marc Dana...

SOMETIMES LOVE JUST AIN'T ENOUGH...

A special day...

I've always loved Valentine's Day...even as a little girl...as my mom would would have a card and a little heart-shaped box of chocolate sitting at the dining room table for me that morning...

oh and today was a really special Valentine's Day as my cousin had her first baby boy and a good friend and co-worker gave birth to her first baby this morning...another little boy...his name is Dylan...what a great name!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Spring cleaning

I would like to say thanks to the "anynomous" posts I received the other day....whoever you are, I don't know if you will ever even read my blog again, and that's okay...but if you do, thanks for telling me what I was pretty sure I already knew.

This morning I went to Marc's to pick up a dog crate of mine...he asked me to return his garage door opener and his Jimi Hendrix drawing - it had been hanging in my living room since we'd gotten back together 3 years ago...I decided to return everything I could find that he had given me over the years including the Hendrix drawing and the garage door opener...

I went shopping and bought myself new pictures to replace the drawings of Marc's that used to hang on my walls...this is one of the replacements and I love it...peace

Then I went to Michael's and trained the border collies, oh they were so happy to work...Bosco ran a couple of sequences too and was a rockstar...well in his mind anyway :)  Pauli hung out inside with Cathy sitting on her lap and chewing on a bone and getting in to things...

I stopped at a beautiful park on my way home and took a couple of pics...I don't have a nice camera, just my iphone but you get the gist of what a gorgeous day it was to be at a park, especially this one.

I still love Jimi Hendrix, but right now, Nickelback couldn't say it any better...and, oh yeah...

I'M GOING SKIING!!!

Life goes on...and it's good

Okay yeah well life can suck sometimes and this week it really sucked for me...but life goes on and I have choices...I choose not to be a victim but to be a survivor and to be happy...I love being happy and my dogs love it when I'm happy.

I have been totally blown away by the support and the incredibly nice posts, emails, phone calls, texts, and messages I have received from my family, Marc's family, and so many dear friends...I am truly very blessed and overwhelmed...

this quote was in one of the many emails I received from a friend and thought it just perfect to post...

Feeling sorry for yourself and your present condition is not only a waste of energy, but the worst habit you could possibly have.
~ Dale Carnegie

and this is what I got in an email from another friend...thank you Kim...

"There are two kinds of people in relationships - Swans and ducks.  Swans mate for life.  When one dies the other has been known to die of a broken heart.  Ducks are only in the moment and can have 10 relationships before lunch.  You, my dear, I am happy to say are a swan, with all the commitment that entails.  Marc - eh - what are you going to do!!  He likely in his own head does love you, its just not the version that befits a swan."  

I deserve better...

AND I joined a local gym and will be getting my mind and body back in shape - I took my first Zumba class on Wednesay night - it was a blast!!!!  Tomorrow I start my weight training...

AND OMG...I AM GOING ON A SKI TRIP!!!

to Breckenridge, Copper Mountain and Keystone!!!!  I haven't been skiing in years and am SO EXCITED :)))))

over

Deception hits at our core...it is wrong by any standard and for any reason, actually there is no reason or excuse for it...and it is incredibly sad at every standard.

It is the complete opposite of integrity and respect and it is frightening to think that children whose parents are capable of this behavior, may grow up thinking it is 'acceptable.'  I can only pray that does not happen to Marc's wonderful son, Dylan.

My happy wonderful life as I have known it for the last 3 years came crashing down on me and ended on Sunday, February 5, 2012.  Saturday everything was as it had been for the last 3 years - just about perfect…we had so much fun taking Dylan to the indoor skydiving place, had a great dinner, and a nice night at Marc’s…until Sunday morning when I went to check my email from Marc’s computer and accidently found myself in his yahoo inbox instead of mine.  I read an email from a woman named Kellie…I have a very good friend with the same name that emails me all the time and so I still had no idea I was not in my inbox, until I read the email.

He did it again…Marc has been living two lives and deceiving me and cheating on me…how could this be possible…why???  How could he do this, again????  Please wake me up from this bad dream, this bad movie, actually more of a nightmare.  It just can’t be…but it is.  To say that my heart is broken is an understatement…there are no words to describe how I feel other than to say I feel dead, nothing, gone…and this time around, I lose his son too…a child I have grown to love like my very own.

I can’t stop crying, I can’t sleep and I can’t eat…but I know I will eventually and I know I will survive…I lived through this exact scenario 12 years ago and I will survive this time too. 

I trusted him again...I gave to him my heart, my soul, my mind, and my body...but this time I can walk away knowing that *I* did NOTHING to destroy the second chance we had.  And with that, I find comfort...just a little.

Marc, if you’re ever man enough to read this post, know that just because I was able to find it in myself to admit my mistakes and accept my responsibility for the role I played in our marriage dying, and I found it in my heart to forgive you for cheating on me 12 years ago, what you’ve done now, you did all by yourself and I will never forgive you and I feel very sorry for you.  I hate you for what you have done.

once being decieved by you, shame on me...deceive me twice, shame on you...

thanks for the pic Greta!